Love

Are we just living for the reward that we know is to come or are we seeking more of His presence now?!
Are we completely missing why He came? Are we blinded just like the Jews?


This past week while my dad has been here, we just had a lot of conversations about the "I wonder's."
Mostly it has sparked from him reading the book "Love Wins" by Rob Bell. Yeah, the one that all that fuss was about. He read it in less than 2 days, while I just picked it up this morning and read 3 pages. I had to stop and even process that. So I had some of the same conversations with my roommate, and we went in circles- through laughter and tears and anger and overwhelming joy. We just stopped and were completely in awe of Jesus. Completely in awe. It really is so intriguing to read, as I begin to wonder- is this whole book wrong? Or have I just believed things because I have been told, and never really sought them out for myself? Whatever my answer may end up being, which I may never have one- I love how much he challenges me to think and to really seek Jesus for His heart. It's amazing how different his perspective is.


Now don't take me for saying that I have a whole new opinion and I completely agree with the 7 pages I have read so far, but it has absolutely made me stop and think- if we know the character and nature of God, and we TRULY believe that God is good ALWAYS, that He is faithful ALWAYS, and that He is ALWAYS redeeming and pursuing- then all the theology and opinions we have accumulated in our many years of believing Jesus...could we be wrong? Or even not completely wrong, but have we maybe have missed who He is, why He came, and made Him who we want Him to be? Sounds like something we as the church have done for some time. Maybe that is why we quickly rebuke this whole new idea, because it doesn't seem fair does it? It doesn't seem fair that if we have given our whole life to serve and love Jesus, that everyone should reap the benefits in the end.


In the book it talks about just that thing. Take the story of the prodigal son, which I'm sure that most of you know. That when the older brother sees that his brother, who just took advantage of everything, comes home and the father throws him a party. Once again, can you imagine that bitter feeling, that deeply rooted anger? I can! And I begin ask God that same question...then what am I even doing here? Why am I in full time missions- giving my heart and soul to pour into people so that they know Your love. And then He follows by saying that, you have been with me all along and EVERYTHING that I have is yours.
Everything that I have is yours. Is yours to enjoy, to know that even though you sin and spit in my face daily- that all that I am is yours. Have I really been living that way? Or do I just continue to look around me to judge if Jesus really cares, or if He really is good?


Now how can we look at Jesus and say that He doesn't love? Because we have been with Him, in His presence all along. All along, we have chosen to fix our eyes on the people around us and say- how can they be living that way and not love Jesus, but still have it WAY better than me? We have become just that- the jealous and annoying brother.
Let us fix our eyes on Jesus.
Stop looking around... and seek Jesus, because He is with us all along, and all that He has is ours. We just choose to look around and say it's not fair.
Side Note: Wanna read a book all about just that? Our inheritance now? Read "Momentum" by Eric and Bill Johnson.


It raises the question of...because I know and TRULY believe that God is good, that He is the one God- then wouldn't our lives truly look so much different than others around us- not just like humanitarians that do good to people and take care of one another, but we just serve a God along with that? Or that we are living as any other religion where we believe that IF we do good, and live our lives well to serve and please Jesus, and love Him- then we will receive Him for always? To go to another better life? Cause that sounds similar to reincarnation to me. It makes me think- WHOA I am so glad that I am not God, and if we have dumbed it down to where we can be the god of our own world, and even if we don't realize it- then why have we made God completely explainable? Cause if we can explain God, then we are god?


Now, clearly I do not know the answers to many of these questions, but things that I have been chewing on and will continue to pray through. But this is the time when my child-like, blind faith, kicks in. I know that I serve a God that is love, that loves, and that is completely, far beyond, what I could ever come to a conclusion on. And that is why I love His mystery. He never bores me.


Take a few days, just to think. Let your mind go to those scary places, and wrestle with Jesus on the hard questions...IT'S OK!